Update: I bought a new programmable thermostat for heat pumps (read: the right one...) It had a good cross referance chart on it for the old reference letters on the terminals to their new one. I also talked to the HVAC expert at work (a building of 500,) and found ou he spent 12 years servicing heat pumps. He came to my house and found a blown fuse on the control transformer, buried deep in the bowels of the air handler. I'm getting a new fuse today, and the new thermostat has been wired. We shall see what happens next...