Pat, you really should check out a book called Understanding Wood Finishing by Bob Flexner. It is probably at your library, or should be. While there is a lot of info about finishes and how to apply them, there is a lot about the how and why of maintaining them.
With your questions on removing white rings, wax, and the unasked questions about the kinds of waxes and polishes that you might be dealing with, I think that this book is worth checking out.